Grandparents don’t always realize how much their words mean to their grandchildren, even years after they’ve grown up.
“Tell me more”
A grandchild begins to share about something they’re interested in. “Tell me more” is a grandparent’s way of showing interest in what they have to say. It could be an anecdote about school or a new friend or just something that happened that day.
They allow the child to finish instead of interrupting with their own stories or advice. Over time, grandchildren learn that their thoughts and ideas are important and that someone is always there to listen.
“I was wrong”
Children may think that adults never make mistakes. Hearing their grandparent admit that they were wrong can have a lasting impact. When grandparents apologize instead of making excuses, they show that age doesn’t always mean being right. Plus, they are teaching their grandchild that it’s okay to admit they were wrong. A grandchild who listens to this lesson may be quick to own up to their mistakes.
“What do you think?”
Just because grandparents are older doesn’t mean they have all the answers. By asking their grandchild, “What do you think?” they allow them to share their thoughts rather than simply agreeing or disagreeing.
It can be something as simple as what to do for a birthday or how to solve a problem with a friend. When children are asked their opinion, they may feel more comfortable making decisions when they get older.
“Take your time”
Kids feel rushed all the time, while getting dressed, trying to learn something new or answering a difficult question. Hearing a grandparent tell them to take time will make those times easier. They will know that they don’t have to be perfect or keep up with anyone. Someday they will remember that it is okay to slow down.
“I love your company”
Children hear people say “I love you” all the time. When someone says “I love your company,” it means something just a little bit different. It can let a grandchild know that their grandparent loves spending time with them. They’re not just spending time with them because they’re family.
They enjoy it because they like being with them, whether they’re playing a game, fixing dinner, walking in the garden, or just sitting around watching TV. They will grow up understanding that simply by being themselves, they can make others happy.
“You can disagree”
Children are sometimes taught that it is disrespectful to disagree with adults even if they have a legitimate reason. When a grandparent tells their grandchild they can disagree, they are allowing their grandchild to have another opinion without guilt.
They can teach their grandchild that two people can look at things differently and still love each other. Grandchildren can carry this lesson through life.
“It’s okay to cry”
Kids sometimes suppress tears for fear of being labelled weak or babyish. When a grandparent says “It’s okay to cry,” they’re assuring the child that it’s normal to feel sad and disappointed. Rather than telling them to snap out of it, they comfort the child and allow them to cry. Grandchildren learn there’s no need to put on a happy face if they’re struggling.
“I’m glad you tried”
Sometimes our efforts don’t turn out successful, especially when we are trying something new. When a grandparent tells their grandchild this phrase, it teaches them that there is honour in trying.
Maybe they didn’t win a contest or maybe something new they tried was harder than they thought. Hearing someone say that can help empower them to try again instead of giving up out of fear of failure.
“I learned something from you”
Grandchildren sometimes think that adults are the ones who teach them new information. So it can be nice to hear those words. Maybe a grandchild teaches their grandparent how to use their phone or shows there is another way to think about something. Grandparents who express gratitude for new things they learn help their grandchildren see that age does not matter when it comes to whose ideas are worthy of consideration.
“You remind me of myself”
Sometimes, grandparents say to grandchildren that they remind them of their younger selves. Maybe they have the same smile, way of speaking or quirky personality. It can start a conversation.
Grandparents may recall something funny they did at their grandchild’s age. Spending time with grandparents can make kids feel rooted in family. They can learn that once upon a time, grandparents were children with hopes and concerns too.
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