11 Unspoken Rules of Modern Relationships That Are Misleading

Every relationship has unspoken rules that we’re all supposed to follow. Why? Because they’re supposed to help us find love and keep it strong. Yet even the best intentions don’t take away from the fact some rules cause us issues! Here are eleven of these misleading rules and why they’re so bad. Follow if you want to—just be mindful.

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Always Be Available

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The idea that you have to be on call 24/7 for your partner is just weird. Sure, being there for each other is great—but everyone needs a little me-time. If anything, constantly being available will set you up for burnout. And, as they say, distance makes the heart grow fonder so make sure you have some space!

Never Go to Bed Angry

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Who decided that solving an argument before bedtime was like a magic potion for relationship bliss? You might even need a good night’s sleep to cool off and think things through. Pushing for a resolution when you’re both tired can force you to say things you might regret—it’s okay to talk it out in the morning instead.

Your Partner Should Be Your Best Friend

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It’s a tall order to expect your partner to be your everything—best friend, love guru & personal comedian. They don’t have to be your best friend but it’s cool if they are! Instead, having friends outside your relationship is healthy since it gives you both room to breathe. You’ll also have different stories to share at the end of the day.

Jealousy Is a Sign of Love

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The old myth that “if they’re jealous, it means they really care” is wrong on so many levels. Honestly, jealousy shows a lack of trust rather than a declaration of love—and you need trust in a loving relationship. Not keeping tabs on each other or feeling threatened by other people in your partner’s life is a sign of respect.

A Successful Relationship Means Doing Everything Together

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While doing stuff together is great, you don’t have to morph into one person. You should have your own hobbies & interests to keep things interesting. It’ll help you both grow as individuals and give you another conversation topic during dinner rather than what happened in the latest episode of your Netflix marathon.

Avoiding Conflict Is Key to a Happy Relationship

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Never simply skip over problems and pretend issues don’t exist. It feels good in the moment—but eventually, things will break down. Facing issues as they happen and working through them together strengthens your relationship and doesn’t mean you’re avoiding conflict. Instead, you’re working out how to handle it together.

Love Conquers All

Love
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Love is powerful but it’s not the only ingredient for a successful relationship. You also need things like trust, respect, communication—and let’s not forget a willingness to compromise. Thinking love can fix everything is only going to cause issues since it takes more than your heart to make things work.

Your Partner Should Complete You

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The whole “you complete me” thing is sweet in movies. Unfortunately, in real life, you’re already complete and looking for someone to fill a void puts a lot of pressure on your partner. It’s healthier to see your partner as someone who adds to your life. They’re not someone who fills a missing piece.

Keeping Score Is Normal

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Treating your relationship like a competitive sport where you keep score of who did what last is a recipe for disaster. You’re not in a relationship to “win” but rather to support your partners. Sometimes you give more, sometimes they give more—that’s just how it goes and you should accept that.

Your Relationship Should Be Easy If It’s Meant to Be

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Whoever said relationships should be easy was probably single! Relationships take work and patience, as well as a lot of communication. Of course, it shouldn’t be a constant struggle but facing challenges together is part of growing as a couple. Don’t bail at the first sign of trouble—work through it together.

Social Media Defines Your Relationship Status

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With so many social media platforms out there, it’s natural to feel pressure to prove your relationship’s worth online. But real relationships are built on private moments & understanding as opposed to likes and comments. Your relationship should involve you two and you two only. Who cares how it looks to everyone else on their feeds?

Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.

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