Our words can sometimes make it convenient for others to take us for granted or dismiss our feelings. Some phrases may seem polite but they convey the wrong message. They can make you seem too agreeable or scared to speak your mind. If you learn to change these phrases, you’ll be in a much better position to define healthy limits and become more comfortable in yourself. Below are 10 people-pleasing words to banish from your vocabulary and what to say instead.
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“Whatever You Want Is Fine”
This is a polite phrase that takes away your preferences. When you say this, you avoid expressing your opinion so that other people will be happy. After a while, it leaves people believing that you have no needs or emotions. Instead, practice saying what you want in the first place, even if it’s as basic as picking a restaurant or an activity.
“I’m Okay With Anything”
This sounds like a convenient way to avoid conflict but it can make you feel invisible. It shows you’re afraid to fight back, even on the small issues. Sharing your thoughts doesn’t mean you’re being difficult. That’s how you tell other people that your opinions matter too.
“Sorry For Bothering You”
If you apologize that you asked for something or needed it, you’re making it look like that your needs are an inconvenience. It puts others over you even if you have an appropriate reason to do so. Instead, say “Thank you” or “I appreciate your help,” which are polite phrases but are not apologetic.
“I Don’t Mind Staying Late”
If you’re willing to sign on for additional work or time, you risk burnout. It will make you appear reliable, but it also creates a certain expectation that you will always push yourself too far. Be more respectful of boundaries by saying no when you need time off or rest.
“I’ll Take Care Of It”
If you take on responsibilities that aren’t yours, others become too dependent on you. You feel good being helpful, but when you are constantly taking on responsibilities, you get overwhelmed. Delegate or ask for others when you can. You don’t have to do it all yourself.
“It’s No Big Deal”
When you minimize what you do or how you feel, others are less inclined to respect you. For instance, when someone thanks you for something, brushing it off with this sentence downplay your hard work. Rather, accept the appreciation for your efforts.
“You Decide, And I’ll Go Along With It”
When you are always deferring to other people, you don’t get to speak for yourself. Compromise is important, but this phrase makes you invisible in decision-making. Make a suggestion, even if it is just a small one. It’s a sign that you respect yourself.
“I’ll Try To Make It Work”
This phrase tends to indicate you are spreading yourself too thin to satisfy others. It might even make you resent yourself when you take on more than you can handle. Instead, be transparent about what you’re comfortable with. It is better to say no politely than overcommitting.
“It’s Okay; Don’t Worry About It”
It is an expression that rejects the way you feel when someone has harmed you. Forgiveness is fine, but a term like this will prevent you from addressing important issues. Telling someone how you really feel can prevent it from happening to anyone else and strengthen relationships.
“I’m Happy To Help Anytime”
Being overly available can make others take you for granted. It’s kind to offer help – but always being on call can wear you out. Set clear boundaries by saying, “I can help you, but I’ll need some time,” or “Let me check my schedule first.” It shows you care without sacrificing your own well-being.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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