Despite what you might’ve heard, a lot of the dating “rules” we hear about are rather outdated and don’t really fit with how we do things today. It’s about time we ditch them! Here are 13 dating “rules” that really need to go. Trust us, your dating life will be a lot better for it because being free from these constraints will help you make more genuine connections. That’s what good relationships are made from.
Featured Image Credit: VitalikRadko/Depositphotos.com.
Playing Hard to Get
The whole “play hard to get” thing is more confusing than desirable. Being open about how you feel & what you want is way more attractive since it cuts through all the guessing games. It also gets straight to the point! Nobody has time for games anyway and these days, being direct is refreshing. It shows you’re mature.
Not Accepting Last-Minute Dates
There’s nothing with saying “yes” to a last-minute date—it doesn’t make you seem too available and the idea that it is is pretty outdated. If you’re free and you’re into them, why not? Life’s too short to play by some rule book. Really, impromptu plans usually turn out to be the best kind of adventure because they’re free from overthinking!
Following the “Gender Rules” of Communication
The old rule that men should make the first move & women should wait a certain amount of time before replying is so last century. Communication should involve comfort and connection. You shouldn’t have to play a role based on your gender—if you want to talk or make a move, just go for it. Everyone should feel free to express themselves.
Playing the Waiting Game
Waiting a long time to reply, just to seem busy or in demand, doesn’t do anyone any favors. It’s much better to be upfront and reply when you can because honest communication will help you build something real. Replying in a timely manner shows that you’re interested in the other person. It also shows that you’re respectful of their time.
Sticking to Your “Type”
Limiting yourself to a specific “type” will stop you from meeting someone amazing. Try being open to different kinds of people—who knows what kind of connections you make? Sometimes, the best matches are the ones you never saw coming and opening your mind will give you experiences that help you grow in the best ways.
Avoiding Dating More Than One Person
As long as you’re honest and transparent, seeing a few people at the same time may help you figure out what you really want in a partner. You’re exploring your options & finding the right fit without rushing into anything. You might even understand what truly matters to you in a relationship. Just make sure to communicate openly to avoid misunderstandings.
The Belief That You Can’t Be Friends First
Who says you can’t turn a friendship into something more? Some of the best relationships start out as friendships because it means you already know you get along great. You’ll also begin with a level of understanding that may be hard to achieve otherwise. This way, your connection will develop naturally, without the pressure of dating expectations.
The Rule of Avoiding Ex-talk on Early Dates
While you don’t want to spend the whole date rehashing past relationships, it’s not necessary to avoid the topic entirely. Even giving them a brief mention will show what you’re looking for and what you’ve learned from past experiences. Just make sure you do it tastefully. It’s part of getting to know someone.
Overanalyzing Texts
These days, most communication happens over text and it’s super easy to fall into the trap of overanalyzing every message. You’re just trying to decode what the other person really means. However, not every “lol” or “ok” is a cryptic message needing that level of analysis. Take the messages at face value because it keeps things simple & reduces unnecessary stress.
Rushing Physical Intimacy
There’s a lot of pressure out there about when it’s the “right time” to take things to the next level physically. Yet there’s no one timeline for everyone to follow. The important thing is to know when you feel ready—rushing into physical intimacy prematurely will put unnecessary strain on a budding relationship. Take your time and let things progress naturally.
Finding “The One”
As romantic as the idea is of finding “The One,” it’s not very realistic. Believing in this will make you overlook great people because they don’t fit into this narrow idea of perfection. There are many potential matches who will make you happy in different ways since they get you & support you. Even making you laugh is far more important than any fairy-tale ideal.
Sweating the Small Stuff
When you’re getting to know someone, it’s easy to get hung up on the little things that might not go as planned. For example, they might be a few minutes late to your date or they text back slower than you’d like. However, these small hiccups don’t necessarily spell doom for a budding relationship. What matters more is how you click when you’re together & how they treat you.
Letting It Get Awkward
Dating is awkward—especially in the beginning. But it’s those awkward moments that are endearing, like a clumsy first kiss or a joke that falls flat. It’s all part of the process of getting to know someone. Instead of stressing over it, laugh it off and keep going because showing you handle awkwardness with grace is attractive. It’ll help both of you feel more at ease.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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