Navigating the rules of Canadian small talk means knowing how to keep conversations both friendly and appropriate at all times.
Rule: Polite distance
Canadians value their personal space a great deal, so don’t stand too close to them. You should be at least an arm’s length away while talking so they don’t feel pressured. If someone leans in closer, take a step back.
This non-verbal hint will let them know you like your space. No one wants to feel cornered. Keeping your distance will allow the conversation to feel breezy and friendly.
Rule: Weather first
If you can’t think of anything else to talk about, try discussing the weather. Canadians talk about the weather almost obsessively.
We have bitterly cold winters and surprisingly warm summers. The weather is a safe and friendly topic that no one will argue about. You can gripe about the snow or rejoice over beautiful weather, and the other person will happily respond with how they feel about it as well.
Rule: Constant apologies
Canadians use brief, instinctive apologies as a social lubricant that keeps daily life flowing along smoothly. Canadians will say it when they need to squeeze past you in the cereal aisle, if two strangers happen to lock eyes, or if someone else bumps into them.
It basically means “I acknowledge your space and mean no offense.”
Rule: Polite agreement
Trying to be likable and agreeable is more important than having the last word or being right. When a disagreement happens, a gentle agreement like “yeah, you’re probably right” is much more common than a blunt disagreement.
Canadians will typically even change the subject if they think there’s any risk of a disagreement in a non-professional situation. Nobody wants to walk away from a conversation feeling uncomfortable or as though they’ve offended someone.
Rule: Queue etiquette
Waiting in line to order breakfast coffee, to board a bus or while at the supermarket checkout is commonplace for idle chatter. Never allow small talk to interfere with your awareness of when the queue progresses.
Pushing past people or allowing someone to accidentally cut in front of you in line is very poor form. It is polite to talk and at the same time, keep strict queue etiquette to show consideration for others’ time.
Rule: Sports talk
Stick to non-controversial safe topics like your local hockey team. Talking about your favourite NHL team’s latest playoff push or a crazy goal from the previous night is a good way to relate to strangers.
Even if you’re not the biggest fan, you can fake your way through by knowing some of the key highlights to get you through a short conversation.
Rule: Soft endings
End the conversation by saying something innocuous that basically lets them know you want to end the conversation. Canadians typically like to end conversations on a pleasant note instead of just walking away.
Finishing with something nice like “Have a good one”, “Take care,” or “Enjoy the weekend” lets you both walk away without seeming rude.
Avoid: American comparisons
Avoid comparing Canadian customs, shopping, or social programs with those of the United States. Hinting that Canada is just like the United States offends Canadian nationalism.
Canadians take pride in the subtle differences between how Canadians live, behave publicly, and what they value compared to Americans. Mentioning something about the way Americans do something will change a friendly conversation into one on the defensive.
Avoid: Politics
Politics is one of those subjects that can become extremely divisive when you don’t know someone well. Sure, Canadians are polite, but you would be surprised how strong someone’s opinion can be on taxes, health care, energy policy, immigration or provincial politics.
For this reason, many Canadians shy away from talking politics during small talk, work functions, or social events.
Avoid: Income
Topics like salary, savings or investments, or other personal finances can feel intrusive for many Canadians.
While Canadians might freely discuss the cost of living going up or how expensive houses or groceries are, they are much more hesitant to share how much money they make or keep in the bank. Friends and family may discuss finances more openly, but with casual friends, such questions may be too personal.