12 Signs Your Partner Is Financially Toxic

Talking about money is hardly the most fun thing you can do in a relationship yet it’s one of the most important. After all, you don’t want to be in a relationship where everything seems peachy until you notice your partner’s financial habits are a bunch of red flags! Rather than simply blowing it all on payday, the signs are often more subtle. Here are twelve things that might suggest your partner is financially toxic.

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They’re Super Secretive About Their Finances

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Asking about your partner’s financial situation shouldn’t feel like an impossible task. Of course, everyone deserves privacy but it’s a red flag when your partner treats their bank statements as top-secret documents. It could mean they’re not great at managing their money—and they’re too embarrassed to let you see.

Borrowing Money Becomes Their Hobby

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It starts small—maybe asking for a few bucks for coffee. But then your partner keeps coming to you as their personal ATM without mentioning payback plans. It’s one thing to help out in a pinch yet a pattern of borrowing without repaying is a red flag that they’re not taking their—or your—financial health seriously.

Credit Cards Are Their BFFs

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There’s nothing wrong with using credit cards, although your partner shouldn’t be swiping theirs for everything & only paying the minimum each month. If they do, they’re probably spending way more than they can afford—which leads to a mountain of debt. Credit isn’t free money. It all has to be paid back eventually, with interest.

Savings? What Savings?

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Not having a safety net for emergencies is a terrible idea—sooner or later, you’ll have trouble. Lacking savings shows a lack of foresight & planning and these are important for financial stability, especially since any unexpected expenses will become a crisis. This will force you both into tough decisions that you could’ve easily avoided.

They Won’t Budge on Spending

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When you’re trying to save up for something big together, what does your partner do? Being unwilling to adjust your spending habits, even when finances are tight, can affect your joint financial goals & plans. Beyond the frustration of seeing money frittered away, their behavior says a lot about their priorities. They should be willing to make small sacrifices now for bigger gains later.

It’s Always Someone Else’s Fault

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Someone who always points fingers at everyone but themselves for their money problems is someone you should be wary of. After all, taking responsibility is important for financial health and without it, solving money problems is far harder. In their eyes, they’re not the problem and if they can’t see the problem, how can you two possibly fix it together?

Big Purchases on a Whim

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It’s quite rude if your partner drops big bucks on something without talking to you first, especially when you’re sharing expenses. Worse still, it also shows they don’t take your shared financial goals seriously. Communication is important—and surprises are only fun when they’re the good kind. Such negligent behavior will strain your budget as much as your trust in each other.

Bills? What Bills?

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Ignoring bills or letting debt pile up is never a good idea. Pretending your financial responsibilities don’t exist will only cause late fees & higher interest rates—and an awful credit score. This can take years to fix. Your partner should be ready to face problems head-on rather than hoping they’ll magically disappear.

Gambling or Risky Investments are Their Middle Name

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A little gamble here, a risky investment there—if it’s more than just an occasional thrill and starts to feel like a strategy, it’s risky. Sure, taking risks can be part of a healthy financial strategy but constantly doing so causes serious financial problems & instability. Any risks that fail will burn your financial future as well as your money.

They Have No Financial Goals

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Dreaming together about the future is part of the fun & your partner should have financial plans. After all, goals will help you make financial decisions and without them, you’ll drift off course. This lack of direction can be particularly troubling when you’re trying to build a life together. Whether it’s saving for a house or planning a vacation, having shared goals will help you make those dreams a reality.

Job Hopping Like It’s a Sport

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Frequently changing jobs is a huge sign of instability and so are long stretches of unemployment without actively looking for work. It’s practically impossible to build a future on shaky ground–and consistent income is important for any relationship’s financial health. A partner who behaves this way lacks commitment & is reluctant to face adult responsibilities.

Your Concerns Are a Joke to Them

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If you try to talk about money and your partner laughs it off, that’s a problem. This dismissive attitude makes you feel undervalued & ignored so it’s harder to build a partnership on that kind of foundation. You have to talk about money. Both partners need to take it seriously for a relationship to thrive.

Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.

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